I'll inherit millions provided I'm not dead!

Every now and again, thanks to the power of The Internet Tubes, we've all been privy to the trust of deposed African dignitaries, who need to transfer their millions of dollars to the US, and, for the use of your own personal bank account and social security number, will pay you $1,000,000.00. Of course, this is nonsense. Realistically, the vig on this type of transaction will only net you about $150,000.00.

In all seriousness, this is merely a variation of the very old-school con game, the Spanish Prisoner (also a pretty decent David Mamet movie with Campbell Scott and Steve Martin). In the modern variation, instead of giving money to an imprisoned (and wrongly identified) dignitary in exchange for their daughter, banking information is provided in exchange for a hefty gift - I've been offered as much as six million dollars on a bait email, but I've never responded.

However, there are groups that bait these scammers in the hopes that by tying up their resources, they can prevent innocent people being duped, and at the same time, get some pretty hilarious pictures. After all, how else can you prove you're a real live dignitary than by posing with a food item or sign as your American contact requests?

Anyhow, today I received quite the notice. In the interest of hilarity I'll post it pretty much as I got it (boldface is mine for emphasis):

Attn: Beneficiary

This is to inform you that the Bank For International Settlement empowered by Central Bank Of AFRICA, has mandated me to contact all the beneficiary who has in one way or the order fail by paying some huge sum of money to AFRICA in other to get their Inheritance or Contract money/fund to know avail. Now I want to inform you that 12 names has been writing out for payment release which includes your name as you can see the other 11 below, but some people has come forth to lay claim on your behalf stating your late and that they are the beneficiary whom your payment should be made to...
...Please respond to the official email below or call the below phone number if possible because we want to know if this information is true before we proceed to pay them and these will be done as soon as we do not hear from you that means we will assume that truly you are dead.
Mr. Moris Smith
AUDIT PAYMASTER GENERAL
BANK FOR INTERNATIONAL SETTLEMENT
COTONOU BRANCH. BENIN REPUBLIC
3F,NO.115, SEC3 MIN SHENG E RD
COTONOU BRANCH.
REPUBLIC OF BENIN

I can't tell you how tempted I am to email back and tell them I am, in fact, dead, and they should disperse the money to my beneficiaries. The only drawback is by responding my email would be added to a list of 'mugus', meaning I'm quite the rube.

If I was a scambaiter, though, I think what I would do is respond by saying that I, me, am actually dead, but that I'm the sole heir, and the other people coming forward are liars. It's great that this inheritance is coming, because I run a small church in rural Rhode Island (get it?) that sure could use the support, and wouldn't you send our congregation a picture of you partaking in our rituals? Great. That makes me feel much better about giving you my bank routing number, my passport, social security card, and a copy of my birth certificate - it's all in the mail! Send that cash-money soon! Rural Rhode Island depends on it!